I dont know what it is

about writing, that makes me feel free. Maybe it is the mental release, the reality being seen on paper. I am not really sure. However there is another part of writing that creates anxiety for me. I find myself traveling back into the past of many years of pain and turmoil that ruled my life. As I wrote during those years some very powerful words I noticed that they seemed to trap me in a place that I longed to run from. Like the words that I was trying to find relief from sucked me in deeper. I noticed that this seemed to become worse for me as I entered a time of long term sobriety. The mask of my life was taken from me and the feelings became so very raw and painful. Journaling, poetry, drawing and photography became an escape for me. Just barely